Did You Know… These Two Things Can Save Your Relationship?

 

There’s a lot of talk over the Internet about how to save a relationship that’s on the rocks. However, a study states that struggling couples need only two things: kindness and generosity.

The Gottman Institute in Seattle identified these key factors after studying the vital signs of couples who were asked about their relationship’s health twice—once six years ago, and again more recently. Dr. John Gottman, co-founder of the Gottman Institute and renowned marriage expert, tells reporters:

“There’s a habit of mind that the “Masters” have, which is this: they are scanning the social environment for things they can appreciate and say thank you for. They are building this culture of respect and appreciation very purposefully. “Disasters” are those who are scanning the social environment for their partners’ mistakes.”

According to the Oxford English Dictionary, to be “kind” is to show “a friendly, generous, and considerate nature.” Meanwhile, to be “generous” is to be prepared to “give more of something” than expected.

Saving a Relationship

One of the most common causes for relationships to end is the loss of intimacy. Intimacy is developed and sustained through the ongoing acts of kindness and generosity that partners express to one another. If your relationship is lacking intimacy, the good news is that many couples have managed to save their relationship through couple’s counselling. There may, after all, be plenty of other issues that interfere with how you and your partner are able to show love and affection. You may be surprised to learn that many of the difficulties can be addressed and healed.

All couples deserve to have the relationship they are longing for. Although the media often portrays images of relationship breakups and quick ‘move-ons’, we would like to offer a new & hopeful perspective – one that allows you to gain the skills necessary to overcome the normal difficulties that are common in most partnerships, and deepen the love that originally brought you together.

Have you committed an act of kindness to your partner today?

How generous do you feel you are in your relationship?

Do you take your partner for granted or do you find ways to give that are meaningful to him or her?

Please leave a comment and let us know what you think!

If you or anyone you know is struggling in their relationship and are ready to take action towards transforming pain and discomfort into joyful curiosity, please don’t hesitate to contact us. We are here to help.

(Source: “Relationships Last When Both Partners Have These 2 Traits,” Headlines & Global News, November 11, 2014)

Wishing you all the best,

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About 

Sue Diamond Potts, M.A., is the Founder and Director of the Good Life Therapy Centre which focuses on helping couples and individuals create loving relationships in the aftermath of addiction and trauma.
If you would like help, please call our office to set up a time to meet with one of our outstanding therapists @ 604-682-1484 or Click Here to Contact Us.

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3 thoughts on “Did You Know… These Two Things Can Save Your Relationship?

  1. My Favourite words Kind and Generous.I would add an evaluation of our” Expectations”, in the mix.Each relationship is unique and does not need to be what may be considered as the ” Norm”…as long as one is comfortable in being and accepting different.
    Giving space is sometimes an act of kindness …I sure did !